Journey to Myself cont.

Wow!!! I had an amazing day. I had two good workouts. The second was cut short due to the rain, but it was fruitful. I have a ton of energy after that exercise. Also, got a chance to read over my writing, and I believe I am picking up where I left off. As for the financial future still looking for a good credit counselor. Overall, great day. Thanks for your support.



Journey to myself

I woke up this morning, and my thoughts were everywhere. I realized that I have been living life for years to please everyone else. Today, however, I decided to ensure my own happiness. I decided to set some goals. I looked at myself in the mirror and saw someone I didn’t even recognize. I allowed myself to become overweight and bitter. So, I have set some goals to ensure that I can be happy with myself and have not only a happy life, but an interesting one as well. 

Goal 1- Be physically active and lose the excess weight. (35 lbs by my birthday, February 29th)

Goal 2- Write my book.

Goal 3-Secure my financial future.


You may be saying to yourself those are some pretty lengthy goals. And how will you be held accountable??? Well, they are lengthy goals, and I want you guys on here, all of my friends to hold me accountable everyday. I need your encouragement and support. Please ask me daily what I have done to accomplish each goal. I need your help. So please if you are able to give me your support I really appreciate it. I don’t want to be bashed . I do not need for you to tell me how outrageous this idea is. I just need your support.

I will start by telling you that today, I went for my first 30 minute walk as a begining runner. It was brutal, but worth it. I felt pumped after my walk. For goal three I have pulled my credit report, and started reviewing where my credit rating is today. And right now I am about to work on goal two by picking up my binder that I started writing my book in a year ago, and I will be reading over what I have already written just to decide if I need to trash the story and start over or continue it as is.


Once again, your support is appreciated, your bashing is not wanted.



So many times we make resolutions with a failure to follow through. So many times we make promises to be there and to make things happen, and then we don’t, and we feel that cringe of failure. But what is failure? Failure is another chance at success. It is a shot at rebirth. It is a time to resolve. A time to make resolutions. I personally have not been a person who makes resolution because of a fear of failure, but now I realize there is no reason to fear failure because I get another shot at getting it right.


Life is funny. You start out giving your heart to a man, and you believe you are his everything. Then you learn how wrong you are when your world comes crashing down around you. What do you do? I have decided to live my life, and not let my personal tragedy define me. I deserve love and happiness.

I got my Wish

I shared here a few weeks ago what I really wanted for Christmas. And what do you think happened? I got my wish. It took my husband moving heaven and earth and sacrificing time with his own immediate family, but I got my wish. I had a chance to go over to my mother’s home for Christmas. I helped with the cooking.All of my brothers and sisters showed up. It was just like old times when we were all kids. There we were eating, laughing, joking, and talking. It’s funny what you get when you just ask for it.

What is Christmas??

So many times I have heard people this season speaking of what they plan to buy for whom, and what they hope to receive. But really what is Christmas?? Think back to your earliest memories and what do you remember most? Was it the gifts? Was it the shopping? What was Christmas in your mind as a child? I’ll tell you what I remember the most. Of course, I remember opening the gifts, and playing with them. But what has stayed with me is the time my family spent together as one. My mother was a single parent working two jobs most times, and she would always go out of her way to make sure us children had the greatest Christmas ever.

I remember my mother would make this huge meal for us. There would be turkey, ham, mac and cheese, collard greens, yams, potato salad, deviled eggs, corn bread, and the list goes on and on trust me. We would all sit around the table eating, laughing, and talking. Most times it would be just us kids and our mom. Other times a relative here and there would stop by, but not too often. I remember the love I felt. I remember the warmth of being in our home with all of us gathered around just hanging out being a family. Now we’re all adults. Mom is remarried. And I don’t get home as often as I would like. But if I could have anything in the whole world I wanted for Christmas it would be to be a Family with my mom, brothers, and sisters at home around the table eating, laughing, and talking. That is what Christmas is to me, being with my family.



There is a mircale of


that dwells in the heart.

And you don’t know how it happens

or gets it start….

But the happiness

it brings you

always gives a special lift,

And you realize that


is God’s most perfect gift.


My Girl

My Carmen came into this world 10 weeks too soon according to doctors on September 13, 2003. My husband and I  gasped as we beheld the tiniest baby  either of us had ever seen in our lives. She was so frail. The little munchkin came in at just four pounds. She couldn’t breath on her own. Touching her seemed to aggravate her. And we could forget even trying to kiss this frail being. She stayed in the hospital for what seemed to be forever. She underwent heart surgery at just six month and another at a little over a year old. She has tons of food allergies, and there isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t worry about her.

Today she’s healthy, full of energy and life. She’s adventurous. She’s brave. When I look at her today, I cannot believe she is the same baby that was in the incubator. She stole my heart. I guess it is true that once you decide to have a child you have decided to have your heart go walking around outside of your body forever. I never knew love like this before. I never thought I was capable of loving this much. Happy Birthday to my first true love, Carmen.

I’m Lydia

Hi!! I’m Lydia, but I like my middle name best, Helena. This is my senior year. I am so excited to be almost finished. As for this class, I am a little nervous. I’m not exactly sure what to expect. I’m guessing by the end of this I will be able to write and design a web page. This could be interesting, or I could fail horribly. I’ll just keep my thoughts open. I’ve never been a fan of blogging, so we’ll see how it goes.